Your limiting belief is that you believe it’s too late to find the love of your dreams.

Whether it’s because you have “loved and lost” or perhaps because you have “never loved at all” in the way you have dreamed, you believe that your chance for great love – to find “the one” – is behind you.

The fix

You can disrupt this belief by recognizing that love has its own timetable and can descend upon you at any moment. If you look around with wide eyes and an open heart, you will see that love knows no constraints, including the constraints of time.


As early as I can remember, I was excited and haunted by dreams of a great love. I saw the reflections of that dream in the frequent and passionate embraces of my parents, who seemed oblivious to anything except each other when they stared deeply into the other’s eyes. I felt the tug of the dream in the pretty face of an elementary school classmate. I caught snippets of its possibility in books, on TV, in movie theaters – anywhere that tall tales of captivating romance were told and sold. And I heard its call in the peerless tenor voice of my father, the cantor, as he sang out in temple, not just for the congregation but for the woman who filled his heart with song.

More than 50 years later, that sweet boy’s lingering dream was being sorely tested. By now, I had experienced the innocent ecstasy of first love and the lingering pain of a failed marriage, with various romantic relationships in between. But at age 62, I was living alone with no prospects on the horizon, trying to reconcile the childhood promise of love with the harsh reality of my seemingly loveless life.

It occurred to me that it might finally be time to heed the advice of the “love experts” and abandon that early vision of perfect love in favor of more proven approaches: online matchmaking, event-driven dating, and settling down with someone who could provide mature companionship, intelligent conversation, and a reasonable measure of physical intimacy.

It was a fork in the road that almost all of us face in one form or another at some point in our lives. We may be enmeshed in a relationship that seems to be going nowhere, wondering if we should move on or instead simply settle down, settle in – and just plain settle – for the partner we already have. We may already be on the other side of such a relationship but not finding anything better than what we left. We may have “succeeded” for a time with love, only to lose our partner prematurely and be left with the conviction that no one could ever take his or her place. Or we may simply have been alone for a very long time, becoming more disheartened with each passing year as our prospects for deep and enduring love, for finding “the one,” seemingly grow dimmer and dimmer.


You may, in fact, be standing at such a crossroads even as you read these words, wondering whether it IS wiser to cling to a dream that seems unrealistic and unattainable, or instead, to lower your sights and just “love the one you’re with.”

If you are looking for advice regarding which fork in the road to take, you’ve probably come to the wrong
place. I don’t know your “calling” or all the laws of the universe, and I’m averse to tinkering with people’s destinies. What I do have to offer is the story of a Love Unimaginable that so blessedly became my story when I made this choice at the crossroads in my 63rd year: I chose love. And, in turn, love chose me.

The full story of that choosing and being chosen cannot be adequately told in this, or probably any other, blog. If you would like more details, you can read the first chapter of my eBook, “A Love Unimaginable” by clicking HERE.

For now, it is enough to say that what whispered and beckoned to me from earliest childhood was not the voice of foolishness or of a false prophet, but rather, a divine promise of human love that has opened the doors to heaven on earth.

As my beloved Juli shared in her wedding vows just a few weeks ago, it is apparently the same voice that spoke to her when she was nine-years-old. She vividly recalled being immersed in a sea of love for those closest to her: her sister, her parents, and her grandparents. And within that sea swam another whom she did not yet know, an unnamed man who, in the future, would bring with him such explosive and transformative love that her life would no longer be recognizable.