If you’ve taken the Love Disruptors Quiz https://quiz.leadquizzes.com/q/3SA0wJ you may have discovered that your limiting belief is that you already know what your perfect partner will look like.
Oftentimes without even knowing it, we make lists in our minds of qualities and attributes that our perfect partner will have. While this can certainly be helpful in some ways, it can be very limiting in others. When you discount opportunities because they don’t fit with your ideas of love, you cut yourself off from that which is better than you could ever imagine.
You can disrupt this limiting belief by surrendering your ideas about love and stepping, instead, beyond your mind and into a love unimaginable.
WHICH WILL YOU CHOOSE – LOVE, OR YOUR IDEAS OF LOVE?
Three and a half years ago, I was faced with a difficult choice. In front of me stood (literally) the most beautiful, brilliant and insightful woman I had ever met. We had been close friends for a couple of months and while we both recognized a deep authenticity and intimacy in our connection, neither of us had any romantic designs on the other. Then, over the course of three days, we shockingly and ecstatically discovered a love that pre-existed our discovery of it. We never “fell” in love; rather, our love was revealed to us, and we “KNEW” that we loved each other with a depth that was beyond either of our capacities to appreciate.
And that beautiful mystery brought me face-to-face with both my past and my possible future.
THE DILEMMA – CHOOSING THE FUTURE
Behind me lay 62 years of ideas – about life, about God, about who I was, and about what love was and could mean for me.
I had grown to love and trust my ideas. They were hard-earned, battle-tested, and had seemingly enabled me to successfully navigate through a full and challenging life.
Before me stood a vibrant, loving woman who, just by being herself, was more than anything I could ever have hoped for in and from love. And therein lay the dilemma. Because Juli was beyond anything I could ever imagine, she did not –she could not – match my ideas of love.
She was not at all interested in the impressive resume of spiritual and worldly accomplishments that I had amassed in the hope of someday attracting the woman of my dreams.
Beautiful as she was, she was not the physical “type” that I had been attracted to in the past.
And perhaps most disconcerting, her love for me far eclipsed what I thought was possible because I couldn’t believe a man like me could ever be loved so fully and deeply by a woman like her.
This disconnect, between the person and the ideas, left me with a choice – one that would quite literally determine the depth of my life experience. I could choose the Love I had always wanted.
Or I could choose the ideas of love that I had always known…
WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE?
So I ask you, how do you feel right now? Which side are you rooting for? What would you think or say to me if I chose to stick with the antiseptic security of my ideas, rather than the living breathing reality of my Forever Love?
Thankfully, to paraphrase the Old Knight speaking to Indiana Jones as he drank from the Holy Grail, “I chose wisely.” Because I abandoned my preconceptions about love in favor of Love Itself, I am at his moment, even as I write, living a reality of love that I didn’t even have the guts to dream.
But how many of us fail to choose wisely in the small decisions about love that we make daily? How often do we reject a person because they do not look the way we hoped they would, a relationship because it comes with seeming complications that don’t match up with our fairy tale conceptions of “happily ever after,” or an opportunity for intimacy because it requires us to surrender some idea of independence or security that we’ve harbored for decades?
While our ideas may serve us well in many aspects of our lives, by their very nature they cannot help but limit us when it comes to the miracle of Love. Juli and I call ourselves “Love Disruptors” because our own surprising discovery of love has disrupted so many of the ideas that we harbored about love. And if we had insisted that the other corresponded to our ideas, that they fit the mold of our preconceptions and expectations, we would have passed on this sacred gift of Unimaginability that the Universe has offered up to us.
Through our blogs and our offerings, we will continue to invite you to examine and “disrupt” your ideas about love. Our hope is that, like Juli and me, you will discover that the love the Universe wants for you is BETTER THAN anything you could dream up in your world of ideas. And only by letting go of these ideas – and embracing the unexpected and unrecognizable opportunities for intimacy that life presents – can you discover a Love Unimaginable, which is better than anything your mortal mind can conjure.